The Heart of a Missionary-


I live for days like Today.

Posted in Randomness,Uncategorized by misspicture on April 28, 2010
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I know i havent been blogging lately. I feel like i do have a lot to say but somehow find it hard to put it all into words.

I dont know.

Im glad keeping a blog is not my job.

I would love to blog for a living though…

and i just contradicted myself.

blah

Wanna know what i learned today after hanging out with a grownup woman ?

God allowed some awful episodes in my life. Just for tonight. Just so i could have something to tell her tonight. I cried, yes. It hurt, yes. But God transformed my tears into wisdom.

and for that… I am thankful

I was, also, able to answer one question that had been dancing around my little head…

….. Is that God’s best for your life?

Yes, sir. It is.

Because He spoke
Because there is peace in my heart
Because it does not hurt. It does NOT hurt.

I live for days like today.
I live for deep conversations where the Holy Spirit is just there
I live for days like today.

: )



He is my portion!

Posted in Insights by misspicture on April 19, 2010
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Im was reading Numbers 18 today

The LORD said to Aaron, “You will have no inheritance in their land, nor will you have any share among them; I am your share and your inheritance among the Israelites. Numbers 18: 20

As a missionary i often wonder about my future. Will i ever get married? will i ever own a house? will i ever own a car? will i ever have children? will i ever…..?

And i had always answered some of those questions with a big fat NO

Missionaries are poor

And sometimes, deep inside, i wish i wasn’t called to leave all the comforts of home to love people i dont even know.

Sometimes, if not most of the times, I am selfish.

This morning God introduced me to a truth i wasnt aware of.

He is my share.

Aaron and his sons were the high priests. They were in the “ministry” and God told him that they will have no inheritance in the Land of Canaan (The promised Land). For me, this means, no house, no car, no land to cultivate, nothing… But im no bible scholar. This might mean something else but just stay with me for a few more minutes. But He said: “I will be your share and your inheritance

I struggled with this for a few minutes. I was like.. “but God, they were the high priests. Arent you going to give them at least some of the land? ” But then i realized God was giving them more by giving them… well… Himself

whoa!

He is my share. He is my portion. He is my inheritance.

He and He alone.

I like Him better than a house, husband, car, and children.

#justsaying.

If you are in ministry today. And are worried about financial/emotional stability. Remember this: He is your share.

Happy Monday!




Jesus time this AM

Posted in Q' Time,Randomness by misspicture on April 15, 2010
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I dont always start my day with Jesus.

It is really stupid, actually. Why would i not start my day with Jesus?

Im going to try to do this like… everyday now.

enough said.

As i was enjoying a cup of coffee (which, by the way, should be next to Bibles, in christians stores… They go so well together) and reading the book of Numbers. I found a couple of verses that moved me to pray a prayer i never thought i would pray. I didnt really know i could pray this. But i did.

Aaron and Miriam were talking trash about moses’ new girlfriend (wife actually.. ) and God didnt like that. and look…

6 he said, “Listen to my words:
“When a prophet of the LORD is among you,
I reveal myself to him in visions,
I speak to him in dreams.

7 But this is not true of my servant Moses;
he is faithful in all my house.

8 With him I speak face to face,
clearly and not in riddles;

he sees the form of the LORD.
Why then were you not afraid
to speak against my servant Moses?” Numbers 12:6-8

did you see that?

God was like… “you know the other prophets? you know how i speak to them through visions and stuff? well… Moses is like my favorite! i talk to him face to face. no need for visions. I speak to him loud and clear”

what?

I asked God if i could be like Moses. Now, i never ever thought i would pray this. And i dont really know why. I just never found moses interesting. I always liked Abraham… with the whole “leave your country and your relatives and go to the land that i will show you…” thing. But Moses? i dont know.. I just never felt like we had something in common.

But i want to have something in common with him. Right now

I want God to talk to me face to face. Loud and clear. Like He used to talk to Moses.

Moses was really confident around God. And i think this might have had something to do with the way God spoke to him.

Moses has become, today, my favorite Bible character.

Who’s your favorite?
why?

Wholeness

Posted in Insights,Randomness by misspicture on April 14, 2010
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I have been implying this in every post for the past few weeks.

I have been writing about how much i love my life right now. And how much im enjoying my last few months in this land i call home.

I have bad days, of course….

But in the middle of the pain and loneliness and fear….

There is something that holds all my pieces together and gets me through those days.

I am freaking WHOLE

lonely

But whole.

There is nothing else i need.

well… maybe $35k

wanna support my mission?
more about that later.

My life is somehow perfect -with all its imperfections- right now.

And i am humbled by it.
I dont deserve this wholeness
But Jesus died so i could have it
and my job is to enjoy it.

Are you whole?

…………….
…………
……

What is missing in your life?

My prayer for you today is that you would replace whatever that is with, well… with Jesus.


Will you believe….?

Posted in Insights by misspicture on April 14, 2010
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Today (I actually wrote this last night) as i was talking to a friend and trying to encourage him. I spoke the words i needed for myself.

Has that ever happened to you?

Its kind of creepy-

My friend just heard from God But is waiting for the promise to be fulfilled.

The circumstances are saying NO
but God said yes…

I know what it is like to stand in that place

a place of insecurities
a place of doubts
a place of uncertainty…

So i told him this:

If God spoke… man! That is all you need to know. Just hold on to His words and wait for His promise to be fulfilled. regardless of the circumstances. Just know He has already done what He promised even if you dont see it right now.

can i get an AMEN?

BANG!

and then it hit me.

That is exactly what i needed to hear. Because I, just like my friend, am standing in that place of uncertainty right now. In the middle of God’s promise and the contradicting circumstances. Between a yes and a no.

How ironic is it that i expect my friend to trust God in spite of his circumstances but i am unable to do so myself. ?

ugh!!

this frustrates me!

Sometimes we have to forget about the world and just close our eyes and let daddy’s voice be our guide and the lamp to our feet.

Today.
I choose to believe what He said.
and give my circumstances a kick in the butt.

‘nough said.

Tuesday

Posted in Insights,Randomness by misspicture on April 7, 2010
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Hello there!

not much goin on right now.

My internet is not working. That’s why im posting this right now.

Today is tuesday. I cant believe monday is over already. And i can not believe i already forgot the fact that i celebrated Jesus’ resurection two days ago.

We make such a big deal of easter sunday in our churches.

but why?  i wonder

If we so easily forget….

May you be reminded today. Tuesday. That Jesus is alive. And He is able to do what He promissed He would do.

Take heart.
He has overcome the cross.

see how lost i am?
sorry.
It is actually wednesday today.

not tuesday.

blah/ 

 

Purity II

Posted in Insights by misspicture on March 25, 2010
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I couldnt stop thinking about purity after i wrote this post. So i decided id go deeper.

Trend: a general direction in which something tends to move for a short period of time

Treasure: any possession that is highly valued by its owner

Purity is clearly not a trend. Purity is a treasure.

a trend is something you follow for a short period of time. A trend is something that changes over time. It does not remain the same. When everyone else stops following a specific trend. Its over. And you are given permission to follow the *next* trend, leaving the old trend behind.

This is not purity. Its not just something the disney stars are promoting. It is not something you can pursue for  a little while and then  forget about it (you could actually… but you shouldnt)

Purity is a treasure. Something valuable. Its deep and not superficial. It’s special and worth fighting for. Money cant buy it. It is also fragile. Purity is a gift worth keeping and protecting. IT is a decision. And there is no turning back.

I believe God can make you pure again if you’ve made some stupid decisions (and im not just talking about sex) in the past. I know He has restored me. He can restore you.

My desire is that you would view purity for what it is. And dont deliberately just follow a trend. I pray that you would decide to remain pure from now on.  Starting today. Forget about your past. I pray that you would treasure your purity, and put guards around it to protect it.

Thoughts?


BONUS- Sonet of the unseen

Posted in BONUS,Poetry by misspicture on March 24, 2010
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For some reason.
Deep inside my wildest dreams.
You are *already* mine.
I *already* have you.
You are here, with me.

Not even your absence can change that.

This is a reality.
In my heart,
in my mind.
and most importantly.
It is a reality 

In  heaven.

Purity

Posted in Insights by misspicture on March 24, 2010
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If you’ve been reading this blog for more than 2 months you probably know that i just recently found out about the Jonas Brothers. and i really like them now.

I have been doing some research about them and (you might already know this. but give me a break. im a *new* fan) found out they wear purity rings. And it seems like all disney artists are wearing them too.

This is awesome.

Im glad kids are listening to a different message.

But im afraid that purity is becoming a trend.

Something that’s in.

Now, that is a good thing. But im afraid that people are taking pledges to remain pure without really knowing what *purity* really means.

Purity is not a trend. Purity is a treasure

I’ve wanted to wear a purity -something- (ring, necklace, brazalete…) for a long time but have never done it for some reason. I think im going to start wearing one before going to Africa. I really think that it would generate spiritual convos over there.

I dont know… I just hope the JBros dont mess up.

This is purity for me-

But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality… Ephesians 5:3a

What does it mean for you?

Hello: Im NUMB

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on March 24, 2010
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Some things just randomly stop hurting. Some things you just get used to. And as scary as that sounds. numbness is what i need right now.

So bring it on, life!

BRING.
IT.
ON.

Im numb.

Cant feel anything.

At least not today-

: )

Oh monday, monday…

Posted in Q' Time by misspicture on March 22, 2010
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After all the things i’ve written this weekend im out of thoughts and ideas. But im still going to update this blog like its my job. Because i love writing and i love those who actually take the time to visit this corner of my world. Thank you/

I think a good thought to start this monday would be one found in Psalms 37:4

Delight yourself in the LORD
and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Start this monday acknowledging that there is something more to this life. Know that everything in you and in this world changes but there is only one thing that remains the same and that is God and His word. Would you think about that today?

Just think about it.

And when you’re done thinking I hope you realize that He is your reason to SMILE even when your circumstances dont give you a reason. He gave you life Today

Be thankful

In a nonreligious way

Just look up to heaven.

And Smile. No need for words.

He understands your smile-

What’s your reason to smile this monday…?
Let’s encourage one another

For me. Its my baby brother whom i got to cuddle with this morning.

What’s your reason to smile?
There is always one-

Happy Monday! : )


Smile :)

Posted in BONUS,Poetry by misspicture on March 22, 2010
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I feel so good…..

I smile like a mad woman
for no apparent reason
I smile
I smile like you were here
But you are not.

And that’s ok
no-one needs you around here
I may want you around
But i dont need you
not right now.

Not to smile.
I can do that without you-

: )

Once upon a rainbow…

Posted in BONUS,Poetry by misspicture on March 20, 2010
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Life goes UP
Life goes DOWN
Dreams change
Friends come and go
But You.
You, my dear
Are what keeps me trying
You, my love
Are the rainbow in my cloudy days.

I love you
Even when i dont feel like it.
I love you

and so, I dance…

At the sound of your silence
at the beat of your music

Once upon a rainbow

It’s TRUE :)

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on March 19, 2010
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I hate your favorite songs
I hate your glasses
I hate your vocabulary
and your inside jokes.

{

But I miss the hug
The one i didnt give you

}

But im looking forward to a lifetime of those.

It’s true.
Waiting is not-so horrible when you are waiting for the right thing.

and you,
You are the right thing.
Its true-

Sometimes-

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on March 19, 2010
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// Dreams are the key to the future
Sometimes you only need the right hand to hold the key //