The Heart of a Missionary-


I live for days like Today.

Posted in Randomness,Uncategorized by misspicture on April 28, 2010
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I know i havent been blogging lately. I feel like i do have a lot to say but somehow find it hard to put it all into words.

I dont know.

Im glad keeping a blog is not my job.

I would love to blog for a living though…

and i just contradicted myself.

blah

Wanna know what i learned today after hanging out with a grownup woman ?

God allowed some awful episodes in my life. Just for tonight. Just so i could have something to tell her tonight. I cried, yes. It hurt, yes. But God transformed my tears into wisdom.

and for that… I am thankful

I was, also, able to answer one question that had been dancing around my little head…

….. Is that God’s best for your life?

Yes, sir. It is.

Because He spoke
Because there is peace in my heart
Because it does not hurt. It does NOT hurt.

I live for days like today.
I live for deep conversations where the Holy Spirit is just there
I live for days like today.

: )



Lemon Pies and cheesecakes….

Posted in Randomness,Support Raising by misspicture on April 23, 2010
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They are part of my vocabulary now.

I bake these and save the profit to go to Africa in sept.

This isnt a burden…. (yet)

I love baking. I am enjoying this.

: )

But after a long day of baking and walking to our CRU meeting -where i sell my goodies every week-……

This is how my beautiful feet look like

swollen

I am beyond tired right now.

‘night-

He is my portion!

Posted in Insights by misspicture on April 19, 2010
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Im was reading Numbers 18 today

The LORD said to Aaron, “You will have no inheritance in their land, nor will you have any share among them; I am your share and your inheritance among the Israelites. Numbers 18: 20

As a missionary i often wonder about my future. Will i ever get married? will i ever own a house? will i ever own a car? will i ever have children? will i ever…..?

And i had always answered some of those questions with a big fat NO

Missionaries are poor

And sometimes, deep inside, i wish i wasn’t called to leave all the comforts of home to love people i dont even know.

Sometimes, if not most of the times, I am selfish.

This morning God introduced me to a truth i wasnt aware of.

He is my share.

Aaron and his sons were the high priests. They were in the “ministry” and God told him that they will have no inheritance in the Land of Canaan (The promised Land). For me, this means, no house, no car, no land to cultivate, nothing… But im no bible scholar. This might mean something else but just stay with me for a few more minutes. But He said: “I will be your share and your inheritance

I struggled with this for a few minutes. I was like.. “but God, they were the high priests. Arent you going to give them at least some of the land? ” But then i realized God was giving them more by giving them… well… Himself

whoa!

He is my share. He is my portion. He is my inheritance.

He and He alone.

I like Him better than a house, husband, car, and children.

#justsaying.

If you are in ministry today. And are worried about financial/emotional stability. Remember this: He is your share.

Happy Monday!




Jesus time this AM

Posted in Q' Time,Randomness by misspicture on April 15, 2010
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I dont always start my day with Jesus.

It is really stupid, actually. Why would i not start my day with Jesus?

Im going to try to do this like… everyday now.

enough said.

As i was enjoying a cup of coffee (which, by the way, should be next to Bibles, in christians stores… They go so well together) and reading the book of Numbers. I found a couple of verses that moved me to pray a prayer i never thought i would pray. I didnt really know i could pray this. But i did.

Aaron and Miriam were talking trash about moses’ new girlfriend (wife actually.. ) and God didnt like that. and look…

6 he said, “Listen to my words:
“When a prophet of the LORD is among you,
I reveal myself to him in visions,
I speak to him in dreams.

7 But this is not true of my servant Moses;
he is faithful in all my house.

8 With him I speak face to face,
clearly and not in riddles;

he sees the form of the LORD.
Why then were you not afraid
to speak against my servant Moses?” Numbers 12:6-8

did you see that?

God was like… “you know the other prophets? you know how i speak to them through visions and stuff? well… Moses is like my favorite! i talk to him face to face. no need for visions. I speak to him loud and clear”

what?

I asked God if i could be like Moses. Now, i never ever thought i would pray this. And i dont really know why. I just never found moses interesting. I always liked Abraham… with the whole “leave your country and your relatives and go to the land that i will show you…” thing. But Moses? i dont know.. I just never felt like we had something in common.

But i want to have something in common with him. Right now

I want God to talk to me face to face. Loud and clear. Like He used to talk to Moses.

Moses was really confident around God. And i think this might have had something to do with the way God spoke to him.

Moses has become, today, my favorite Bible character.

Who’s your favorite?
why?

Wholeness

Posted in Insights,Randomness by misspicture on April 14, 2010
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I have been implying this in every post for the past few weeks.

I have been writing about how much i love my life right now. And how much im enjoying my last few months in this land i call home.

I have bad days, of course….

But in the middle of the pain and loneliness and fear….

There is something that holds all my pieces together and gets me through those days.

I am freaking WHOLE

lonely

But whole.

There is nothing else i need.

well… maybe $35k

wanna support my mission?
more about that later.

My life is somehow perfect -with all its imperfections- right now.

And i am humbled by it.
I dont deserve this wholeness
But Jesus died so i could have it
and my job is to enjoy it.

Are you whole?

…………….
…………
……

What is missing in your life?

My prayer for you today is that you would replace whatever that is with, well… with Jesus.


Will you believe….?

Posted in Insights by misspicture on April 14, 2010
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Today (I actually wrote this last night) as i was talking to a friend and trying to encourage him. I spoke the words i needed for myself.

Has that ever happened to you?

Its kind of creepy-

My friend just heard from God But is waiting for the promise to be fulfilled.

The circumstances are saying NO
but God said yes…

I know what it is like to stand in that place

a place of insecurities
a place of doubts
a place of uncertainty…

So i told him this:

If God spoke… man! That is all you need to know. Just hold on to His words and wait for His promise to be fulfilled. regardless of the circumstances. Just know He has already done what He promised even if you dont see it right now.

can i get an AMEN?

BANG!

and then it hit me.

That is exactly what i needed to hear. Because I, just like my friend, am standing in that place of uncertainty right now. In the middle of God’s promise and the contradicting circumstances. Between a yes and a no.

How ironic is it that i expect my friend to trust God in spite of his circumstances but i am unable to do so myself. ?

ugh!!

this frustrates me!

Sometimes we have to forget about the world and just close our eyes and let daddy’s voice be our guide and the lamp to our feet.

Today.
I choose to believe what He said.
and give my circumstances a kick in the butt.

‘nough said.

A special message-

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on April 13, 2010
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I couldnt decide which one to post.

so im posting them both.

I am a real person #1 from Miss Picture on Vimeo.

I am a real person #2 from Miss Picture on Vimeo.

: )

BONUS- #Thankful

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on April 10, 2010
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Its 12:31 am and i cant sleep.

After all that Jonas Brothers talk i had today…..

GOSH! I dont want to like them this much. But i do! WHY>?!

They really are not that good. But their songs are just stuck in my little head.

anyways….

This is a happy post.

A thankful one.

Because there are people in this world that understand me. They love me. They get me. They read between the lines and they understand exactly what i want to say. People who finish my sentences.

People i will miss.

I am thankful today.

I am whole. I could live this live im living right now forever.

No need to change a thing.

God has been good.
He gets the glory.

Where was I….?

Posted in Integrity Music,Randomness by misspicture on April 8, 2010
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Where was i in 2007?

MAN!

where was i when the Jonas Brothers were on the radio?

Where was i when Taylor Swift was dating Joe?

Where was i when Bethany Dillon was single?

where was i when Casting Crowns released their newest album?

Where was i….?

Music used to be such a big part of my life. I used to know everything about every band or solo singer. I used to write songs and i used to sing. a-lot.

where was i when i lost my passion for music?

I cant remember.

But i know where i was when i got it back.

I was trying to go online and i couldn’t. My internet has been acting funny for the past few days. So i decided to sit on my bed and just chill for a while.

And it came back.

The lyrics
The music
The melody

The voice.

And i did what i enjoy the most.

I wrote.

But this time. my sentences rhymed…..

I wrote a song.

Recently i was contacted by Integrity Music. They would like me to blog about their stuff.  And at first i was like… blah! because music had, for some reason, lost its appeal. But now its back.

And i get to blog about it.

I will close this post with one little thought.

Dreams
DO
Come TRUE

Tuesday

Posted in Insights,Randomness by misspicture on April 7, 2010
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Hello there!

not much goin on right now.

My internet is not working. That’s why im posting this right now.

Today is tuesday. I cant believe monday is over already. And i can not believe i already forgot the fact that i celebrated Jesus’ resurection two days ago.

We make such a big deal of easter sunday in our churches.

but why?  i wonder

If we so easily forget….

May you be reminded today. Tuesday. That Jesus is alive. And He is able to do what He promissed He would do.

Take heart.
He has overcome the cross.

see how lost i am?
sorry.
It is actually wednesday today.

not tuesday.

blah/ 

 

BONUS- Sonet of the unseen

Posted in BONUS,Poetry by misspicture on March 24, 2010
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For some reason.
Deep inside my wildest dreams.
You are *already* mine.
I *already* have you.
You are here, with me.

Not even your absence can change that.

This is a reality.
In my heart,
in my mind.
and most importantly.
It is a reality 

In  heaven.

Purity

Posted in Insights by misspicture on March 24, 2010
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If you’ve been reading this blog for more than 2 months you probably know that i just recently found out about the Jonas Brothers. and i really like them now.

I have been doing some research about them and (you might already know this. but give me a break. im a *new* fan) found out they wear purity rings. And it seems like all disney artists are wearing them too.

This is awesome.

Im glad kids are listening to a different message.

But im afraid that purity is becoming a trend.

Something that’s in.

Now, that is a good thing. But im afraid that people are taking pledges to remain pure without really knowing what *purity* really means.

Purity is not a trend. Purity is a treasure

I’ve wanted to wear a purity -something- (ring, necklace, brazalete…) for a long time but have never done it for some reason. I think im going to start wearing one before going to Africa. I really think that it would generate spiritual convos over there.

I dont know… I just hope the JBros dont mess up.

This is purity for me-

But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality… Ephesians 5:3a

What does it mean for you?

Hello: Im NUMB

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on March 24, 2010
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Some things just randomly stop hurting. Some things you just get used to. And as scary as that sounds. numbness is what i need right now.

So bring it on, life!

BRING.
IT.
ON.

Im numb.

Cant feel anything.

At least not today-

: )

What’s your passion?

Posted in Q' Time by misspicture on March 23, 2010
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As you read HERE God is re-directing my vision and passion for Africa.

He has been tackling me with opportunities to serve/love/disciple young women in this city. And the more i pack my agenda with dates (with precious girls) the more i realize I was created for this.

I have a tendency to empathize.

I also have a tendency to hurt when they hurt and rejoice when they do.

I dont know. I just happen to have a heart for girls

I am passionate about it.

It all started one summer afternoon in Spain [2005]. When During an outreach I met a women who was going through a hard time. I picked a flower and handed it to her. Then she looked me in the eyes and said, “Thank you, this is who Jesus is.” When I saw her need, I realized that women in  Africa lack the love, value and acceptance that Jesus offers.  And that is why I feel called to minister there.

That day… I knew i was supposed to minister to women.

But there is one little problem. i kind of wasted 5 years of my life thinking that i was supposed to serve/love/disciple women over there. I forgot about the women God had placed in my life. Here

But its never too late

and so, I am investing my life in a few girls this year (or should i say 23 weeks?)

Would you please pray That God would make room in my busy agenda, so i can pour out my life in the lives of these girls?

Now. Its your turn
What is your passion?
How can i pray for you?

GO!

Smile :)

Posted in BONUS,Poetry by misspicture on March 22, 2010
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I feel so good…..

I smile like a mad woman
for no apparent reason
I smile
I smile like you were here
But you are not.

And that’s ok
no-one needs you around here
I may want you around
But i dont need you
not right now.

Not to smile.
I can do that without you-

: )

It’s TRUE :)

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on March 19, 2010
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I hate your favorite songs
I hate your glasses
I hate your vocabulary
and your inside jokes.

{

But I miss the hug
The one i didnt give you

}

But im looking forward to a lifetime of those.

It’s true.
Waiting is not-so horrible when you are waiting for the right thing.

and you,
You are the right thing.
Its true-

Im Scared-

Posted in Support Raising by misspicture on March 18, 2010
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You might think that i love to write everything i feel on my blog.

You might think that it’s easy for me to be vulnerable.

You might think i enjoy it when people see me emotionally naked.

The truth is.

Sometimes writing and being vulnerable is neither easy or fun.

I am scared.

and alone.

I am not good with words. There is no way i can convince people to give to this cause. I cant speak in public.

*sight*

A video im not allowed to share on the internet just changed that. Man i wish you could see it.

It would make you want to join our team in Africa. I promise you.

and while writing this, seeing the beautiful faces of some precious friends. I realized…

Im not alone.

There’s M*, there’s G* and As*
There’s L* , D*, A* and J*

(sorry. didnt ask for permission to share their names)

young men and women who share the desire of my heart. Who hope to see vail-less faces some day soon. The bravest people i’ve ever met.

We share a passion.

And no matter how far we are from each other. We will always have Africa in common.

Im still scared.

But im not alone-




Codependency and “Missionary” Dating-

Posted in Randomness,Uncategorized by misspicture on March 15, 2010
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Last weekend i had a hard conversation with a friend of mine. He is precious and I love him very much.

He is dating a beautiful almost-perfect non christian girl.

And this broke my heart

I remember this guy being so in love with Jesus. So involved at his church. So involved in fellowship with other believers and building up relationships with godly men. I remember him sharing his faith whenever he had a chance to. I remember this guy following Jesus.

I sat with him this weekend.

And i saw a guy who is in love with a girl.  spends all his time with her. when he’s not with her he’s thinking about her. If he’s not thinking about her he’s probably talking to her on the phone. This guy lost his friendships with godly men -not because his friends wernt there for him. But because he didnt care for them anymore-. This guy is not spending time with God. He is not sharing his faith. He is starting to get bitter. He is hurting. He is alone.

I told him what he needed to hear.

He hated me for a few seconds. I saw it in his eyes. But then he thanked me.

Im not sure if he is going to end that relationship. He really loves her.

But im afraid he is loving her more than he is loving God.

And that is never. NEVER. A good thing.

I hurt for him. Not only because he is alone right now (that is a big part of my concern) But mostly because the girl he is inlove with does not know His saviour. Im sure that sucks.

This is a sad post.
Because this makes me very sad.

THOUGHTS?

BONUS-

Posted in 2x1=2,BONUS by misspicture on March 15, 2010
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I said i would write in spanish more.

but nah.

I’ll leave that for facebook.

This blog will remain an “english blog” (not sure if that makes sense)

Im sorry for my lack of consistency during these past few weeks. I have been a bad blogger and i hate that fact. Ill try to be better-

Today is sunday night and i grabbed my Bible for some 2×1 reading plan. But before that I said a quick prayer. Not very elaborated. It was simple.

Something like.

“-God, Im not going to ask you to confirm what you’ve already promised because you’ve already confirmed it about 4 times now. But please, help me, help me be confident that this is coming from you. And not my mind/heart. Lord, why is this taking so long? Why am I not seeing signs? why arnt the circumstances clear? – Amen”

Not a very spiritual prayer.

But that’s what i said. Didnt thank Him for today. Didnt praise Him. I just told Him that.

Its not the kind of prayer they teach you on sunday school.

Give me a break-

apparently He heard me. of course He did

I stumbled upon this.

When Pharaoh let the people go, God did not lead them on the road through the Philistine country, though that was shorter. For God said, “If they face war, they might change their minds and return to Egypt.” 18 So God led the people around by the desert road toward the Red Sea. [a] The Israelites went up out of Egypt armed for battle. Exodus 13:17-18

I dont know about you. But for me.

It is clear-

God didnt show the Israelites the short cut, primarily,to protect their future. (at least that’s how i see it) why do i say that? well, easy! Had they taken the short cut -the Bible says- They would have gone back to Egypt when faced with the first battle. And God didnt want them to go back to being slaves. He was protecting the promise He himself had made.

How does it relate to me?

There is a promise. An amazing promise that im having a hard time believing.

It’s just too good to be true.

But it is. Even if my head refuses to believe.

And it seems like God is not showing me the short cut right now, in order to protect His calling for my life (and i see how this applies in a practical way). But it also seems to me that, as He did with the israelites, He is taking me to my promised land (not an actual land). Eventually. When the time is right.

Read why Im believing this. HERE

My simple. Not elaborated-prayer was answered.

Thank you, Jesus.

Am i over reacting?

Am i misreading Scripture?

Am i crazy for believing this?

HELP

THOUGHTS?

Please.

ENCORE-

Posted in Encore by misspicture on March 10, 2010
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I wrote this on july, 23 2008

JUST A THOUGHT-

Sometimes i really wonder how people without Jesus live. Its been a question in my mind for quite a while, and God’s constant answer is- “They Dont”
They dont live, the bible is clear, Jesus is life and whomever believes in Him will not perish but have everlasting life. (John 3:16) according to that verse, those who believe in Jesus have life, cuz that’s what Jesus himself is.. But what about those who DONT? they will perish, according to the Word of God. What does perish mean? well, in other versions this portion of john 3:16 is translated as… “….believes in him will not DIE….” so perish means death, spiritual death, separated from GOD.
i picture my lord, reaching out to them longing for them to have life, wispering to their ears, and i see them rejecting the blood of Jesus, i see them hurting between smiles.. they are happy people we often think. but we know they look for happiness in all the wrong places, there’s only one thing that can fill them up, and they would see it if they would just look at the cross. I see my Jesus, saying their names, I see my savior diying for them, and i see them waisting the best years of their lifes.
i see them hurt the same way i used to, i see them lost the same way i was, i see their empty hearts the same way mine was, i see tears everynight, i see broken hearts, and i see no hope.. you see, they are just as blind as i was.

God does not need us, we need him. -weather you want it or not- You need Him, and He WANTS you-

Today my heart bleeds,
it bleeds for those who pretend to know it all
it bleeds for those who think they are happy
it bleeds for those who hide their emptiness
it bleeds for those like you
for those without Jesus-

Thoughts?

ENCORE-

Posted in Encore by misspicture on March 9, 2010
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I wrote this on AUGUST 31, 2007


WORSHIP-

There is a lot going on with me right now. Theres a lot of decisions to be made, and that stresses me out. Things like what to do after college and choosing a mate, are running around my head, day through night. Sometimes, i cant even sleep.. And i know i need to lay my thoughts to the cross, but i just find it really hard.


God keeps doing weird things, things that, acording to me, are bizard. I just dont seem to get what in the world He is thinking, isnt He supposed to take care of my heart? isnt He supposed to help me keep my thoughts organized? after all that has been my prayer for a while.. But no, aparently He keeps allowing my thoughts to run around my head, and they just dont stop. ive been getting head aches and all.


I seriously dont understand what God is doing with me right now, but theres something inside of me, that shouts ¡Its all good!. There is something within me, that draws me to my bible everynight.. Theres this hunger for His word, a hunger ive never felt before, and even thought im just a child who doesnt understand what her dad is doing, for some reason i feel closer to Him. He is teaching me how to kneel and how to walk in His presence.


This is inidiscribable


Last night i had a dream, it was a good dream.. probably too good. But i sorta woke up thinking that had actually happened, and then realized it was just a dream, and it was the worst thing… And i dont know why i had that dream anyways, after all i didnt need to be all disapointed this morning.


i hated it, i was so mad.
I didnt understand, but i chose to worship.

and i felt peace.
never ending peace.

Not understanding, can be really hard for me, because i want to know whats going to happen.. and i want to know NOW.

but seriously, when i think about the cross, and when i think about how much He really loves me, my crazy annoying thoughts just go away.. And worship is all i can do.

crying has never felt so good
as it did this morning.

He is faithful, kids
and i cant stop speaking of His goodness.

so, worship Him
no matter what you are going through
come to Him
just come to Him

I remember this day. clearly And that dream surly didn’t come true. BUT I can tell you something today. almost 3 years after i wrote that.

It will be ok.

whatever you’re going through. Just choose to worship Him.

and.

It will be ok.

Im ok now.

🙂

Thoughts?

ENCORE-

Posted in Encore by misspicture on March 8, 2010
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Ok, I have decided to post some old things that ive written.

I wrote this on  Agust 23th 2007

DISCIPLESHIP-

here is a thought about what God has been teaching me these days.

what if we are being selfish?
what if by going to these mission trips we are just sharing a small part of the Love of God.?
What if we are keeping
THE BEST PART to ourselves?
yes, the best part of salvation, is not knowing what Jesus did, and how much He loves us, the best part is actually LIVING His love.
the best part of Christianity is JESUS HIMSELF. is the RELATIONSHIP.-
are we sharing that, or are we keeping that to ourselves?

people, we need more.
God demands more from us.

When we read about Jesus in the bible, we see a Jesus that not only spoke of the Love of the father, we see a Jesus showing it, we see a Jesus living it. we see a Jesus that loves relationship. we see a Jesus that went to weddings, he had dinner with people, he was trying to speak with a lot more than words, he was speaking throughRELATIONSHIP.

I understand one-week long mission trips. where theres no time for follow up. But what if we change our minds, and stop thinking about how many people get saved, and start thinking about how many people are following Him. What if, instead of going to several places, we split up and try to spend one week doing discipleship and sharing The love of God with one family.
i garantee, we will see more fruits. and maybe not a lot will get saved, but a few will continue to follow Jesus. and then, and only then, we will be fullfilling the Great commision. Jesus, says to go and make DISCIPLES of all nations, not just believers.

we want disciples
we want all nations to follow Jesus, not just to know him
knowing him is not enough, it may be enough for salvation
the bible says that whosoever believes in him, will be saved, but salvation is not the point here. A bunch of people can get saved, and they will go to heaven. but they will not know their father, because they didnt enjoy a personal relationship with Him while here on earth.

is that what we want?
i dont think so.

We have been talking about love
yet, we have not shown it the way we are supposed to.
we must care about these people, and start sharing the best part of
christianity. Jesus himself.

Think about it.
and ask God to show you His heart.
we need to start a revolution
God demands more from his children

I dont clame to be right here.

what are your thoughts?


BONUS- Ten reasons why…

Posted in 10 Things by misspicture on March 7, 2010
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Ten reasons why I believe God said YES.

1- Obedience to God let me to it

2- God has spoken various times. Through His words mostly

3- I had been praying for this exact same thing for about 7 years

4- I have peace in my heart like never before. I am not anxious

5- I have not cried a single tear.

6- Everytime i doubt. God gives me a reason to stop

7- This is all about God. It really is all about Him.

8- It feels right

9- The right people agree

10- There is really no reason for Him to say no.

11- God is still sitting in His throne

12- This really looks like something God would agree with

13- I was not expecting this.

14- I was not looking for this.

I know i said 10 things. blah!

u with me?

It is official!

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on February 25, 2010
Tags:

YES>

I applied yesterday and got accepted today.

I am going to Africa for 10 months in 27 weeks.

I already have FOUR team mates.

THREE of them are girls and we will be living in the same apartment.

And there is one other boy who will live in another building nearby

I am so excited.

I have been talking to my -future- roommates a lot lately and they are so sweet and it seems like we are going to get along pretty well.

They informed me today, however, that there is one other girl who might join our team but still hasnt been accepted. And that might mean renting another apartment for two of us. (current apartment fits 3-4 ppl)

Im not looking forward to this. I want all of us to be together. But… whatev…

I shouldnt be worried about that right now.

It is official

Im an intern with Campus Crusade for Christ.

Let the real fun start.

MPD. Here i go.!

Holiness

Posted in Daniel Fast,Randomness by misspicture on February 25, 2010
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But now you must be holy in everything you do, just as God who chose you is holy. 1 Peter 1:15

What does that even mean? to be holy…

Well.. Let’s ramble for a second or two.

Holiness is all about your heart. Its about your motives and not about your actions.

It really doesnt matter how many days you go on a Daniel Fast. If your heart is not growing closer to The Father, then i would say you are just on a diet. (guilty)

It doesn’t matter what you are giving up for lent. If you are not finding yourself more and more dependent on God. Then you are just following a crowd.

It doesnt matter how many “christian” books you read. If you are not learning about the character of God AND applying your knowledge about Him…. Then i would say you are wasting your time.

It doesnt matter how many hours a day you spend reading The Bible. If the information you are reading is not causing a transformation in you… Then you are missing the whole point.

Arent we so legalist sometimes? (Am i speaking for myself? come one… you are, too, sometimes. RIGHT?)

We -sometimes- do all these things ultimately to feel good about our-little-selves.

Holiness is an issue of the heart.

BUT how can we be holy when our heart is sick with sin?

Well i dont have an answer.

But my best shot would be that we need to examine our hearts everyday. and ask for forgiveness everyday.

This just hit me today as i realized i spent all my day watching “J.O.N.A.S” (yes… they have a tv. show. i love it) and it was 9pm and i had still not had my time alone with God. And im supposed to be fasting, right? Fasting for who? the jonas? i dont think so. So I sat down and asked for forgiveness.

And you know What?

He Forgave me.

as usual.

My heart is wicked. prideful. selfish. rebellious. I am so glad He chose to love me first.

Im in love with Him. ❤

BONUS

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on February 19, 2010
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I want to write about so many things right now i dont know where to start.

First off i want to ask all of the bloggers out there a question. Or two.

Why did i have 24 readers yesterday. But had 5 readers the day before? What makes a blog readable? what made it readable yesterday? Im curious

There is something else.

I am pregnant

No.

Not with a baby.

With a vision. A new vision

And as scary as it sounds. It is not for Africa.

For the past few months God has been re-directing my passion for Africa. He wants me there next year. I would even say He wants me there for a good 2-5 years. *This is yet to be confirmed* But I really believe God wants me somewhere else after that. Doing something i love to do.

But there is one problem with that. People will not believe this. Because i cant count how many times i have said God was not calling me there. And He wasn’t. But He may be now. People will criticize me im sure.

I know i shouldnt be thinking about this now. Because im just 28 weeks away from seeing the fulfillment of God’s promise to my life. Something ive been waiting for 4 years.

But it just hit me today.

This leaves me thinking that God is able to re-direct the vision He’s already given you. And re-define the passion of your heart. For the sake of His great calling for your life. Note that im not saying “change” im using the terms “re-direct” and “re-define” as indicators that there is a core value, if you would. And that will never change.

What do you think? Do you think God can do that?

What does a missionary look like?

Posted in Insights,Randomness by misspicture on February 17, 2010
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Last night someone told me i was too “snobby” to be a missionary. I laughed at first but then i felt sad.

What does a missionary look like?

Is it because i own a Mac?

Is it because i’ve been blessed with the opportunity to travel to a few countries?

Is it because i drive a nice truck?

It’s not mine. Not even close. Its my moms. Most of the times i take public transportation. But of course you dont know that.

Is it because i speak english?

What does a missionary look like?

TELL ME!

This whole time i thought it was a heart issue. That it didnt matter what you looked like or how you dressed or what you drove or what computer you owned. I thought the fact that i voluntarily wanted to give up all the comfort i have at home mattered. I am not rich, nor are my parents. But we have a comfortable life.

and guess what?

I dont want it.

I want to give, give, give, like a crazy lady. I want to give everything i have. I dont want comfort. I want Jesus.

I thought that made eligible for the missionary position

I wish i could just send that person an email with a list of all the things im doing to prepare myself for next year. How im being diligent, how bad i beg God every day to shape me,  to make me the woman He wants me to be and to teach me how to die to myself. everyday. every minute. every second.

But I wont.

No one needs to know that but Jesus.

And He already knows.

I still love this person, respect him and appreciate him.

But this hurt.

FLF

Posted in FLF by misspicture on February 12, 2010
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Today i just want to talk about a simple principle that is applicable to every situation in life.

“You cant help those who dont want to be helped”

You cant make them stop sinning.

You cant make them focus.

You cant make them read their Bible.

You cant make them a budget.

You cant organize their lifes.

You cant buy them more hours.

You cant fix their relationships.

You cant get them a job.

You cant!
Not if deep inside they really dont want to make adjustments in their lifes. You can share all your knowledge/experiences/testimonies with them or you could even set an example for them to follow. But if they dont want to. Boy! they just wont.

This is frustrating.

But my guess is you are only responsible  for what YOU do/say/think. What others do/say/think is really not your responsibility. You can set an example for them  But if they dont respond to it in a positive way. I would say you are out of it. Its their deal!

What do you think?

While you think. I will leave you with a little treasure i found. It’s been out there for a while now.I knew it was there. I just never took the time to listen.

I even have a friend who looks just like one of these three kids.

Where was I?

They even came to Venezuela and i missed them.

DARN it.
Same thing happened with the Backstreet boys. I discovered them a little too late.

Confession: I like the Jonas Brothers. Taylor Swift. And Miley Cirus

I might be a little too old to like them. But i do. so, shut up/

Have a great weekend.

Oh Oh OH! i almost forget!

What are your plans for valentines day?

: )


What im reading…

Posted in Insights by misspicture on February 11, 2010
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A good friend of mine, my leader, and my mentor, once told me to stop reading books about love and relationships.

I respect him.

So I Did.

For about a year.

He was right. I was thinking too much about it. And swallowing way too much information. Im glad i stopped. It helped me focus on THE  ultimate Book. The Bible.

But i picked this book up yesterday. My good friend Jyll – also one of my mentors-  gave this to me 2 years ago for my birthday. And as i started reading it again last night. The thoughts i had 2 years ago  came to mind and seemed so bizarre.

Let me break this down for you.

Two years ago i felt slapped in the face. As the writer described single women and the common mistakes they often make…. or should i say “we”? yeah… The mistakes WE often make.

But last night. I didn’t feel like that at all. I felt rather affirmed.

AND It scared the heck out of me!

I dont really know why. But it did

I had highlighted this: “Fourth, your marriage will only be as successful as your single life. Nurture wholeness where you are”

two years ago my thought was: My boyfriend/future husband will complete me. I will not be whole until i meet him.

My thought last night was: I am complete in You, Lord.

Needless to say, i was wrong two years ago.

suddenly the words in that book were not correcting my behavior anymore. They were encouraging me to keep doing what im already doing. And yes, it was a little scary but at the same time refreshing and liberating.

I am whole. I have found joy, contentment, hope, peace, love and even entertainment in my relationship with Jesus. I need nothing else. Dont get me wrong! i still want to get married and raise godly children. It’s one of my deepest desires. But Marriage is not an idol anymore. It used to be.

Im glad i realized that last night.

I will finish up that book one more time. But this time i wont be looking for answers.

2×1= 2

Posted in 2x1=2 by misspicture on February 10, 2010
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I’ve got a new challenge!

Read the Bible in 2 years. 2 chapters a day.

Do i want to do this?

NO!

Is my pastor making me?

YES!

But dont worry. that is a good thing.  🙂

But let me explain my situation for a minute. 35 days ago i finished up the whole Bible and i did it in 90 days. B90X And yesterday i finished up reading the New Testament in 30 days NewThru30 Thank You Elevation Church

BUT i am drained. I am exhausted from speedy reading plans. They are AMAZING i loved them, i enjoyed them, i learned so much BUT i was just getting ready to start reading on my own and studying whatever i wanted without having to read something in particular. Oh well! It’s all good.

I am so thankful for my pastor. I LOVE the fact that he is encouraging us to do this. I LOVE that we are doing this together. It makes me smile.

And i will stop complaining. I am starting tomorrow. And im kind of excited… You know how much i love challenges!

So February will be a -heavy- month.

– Daniel Fast from feb 15th to March 7th (this means not eating out)
– Reading the book of Ruth everyday while fasting
– 2×1= 2

Ahhhhh! I changed my mind! i WANT to do this. I love challenges! i love them. Specially when they draw me closer to Jesus.

What about you?

How are you intentionally nourishing your relationship with Jesus?

Unsuccessful

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on February 9, 2010
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I am sitting at the nearest subway right now. It is sunday dec 27th. And i came here to have a Hot date with Jesus. But Oh my Gosh! this place is LOUD.
I cant concentrate.
But i figured it is not about the place’s quietness. It is about my hot date. It is about Jesus and how much i love Him. It is about my precious saviour and the oportunity ive been given to have His words, His mere words opened in front of me.
You make the catchy music disapear. You are worth silencing shakira’s voice (old-in-spanish-shakira. Listen to her! she was way better then….)
Today, as my attempt to spend a quiet time with Jesus wasnt succesful. I leave my Bible open, and let Your word speak to me. I let your presence fill this place. I let your presence fill my day.
I love you, my love.

Support Raising.

Posted in Support Raising by misspicture on February 8, 2010
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I was talking to one of my -possible- roommates for next year the other night and was telling her how scared i was about support raising. I told her i didnt even want to try. I am so not confident about this.

I KNOW in my mind God will provide. I am sure He will!  But for some reason i am not friends with the idea of “asking people for money” I am not good at it. Im scared about how vulnerable i will get and how lonely i will feel.

confession: I feel lonely right now. And i have not even started. I guess this is the life of a missionary.

I just cant do this.

I have ZERO skills.

But guess what?

I had my first donation last night.

And no. I dont know this person.

I didnt even ask for it.

It just came my way.

Unbelievable !

I dont even want to imagine what’s next in this journey. There is fear and lots of anxiety but there is also excitement. I feel like God is being so gracious and so clear. I have never felt Him so close and so involved in my life before.

Please keep praying for support. (i have not officially started. I will let you know when i do) I will keep you posted/

BONUS

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on February 6, 2010
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I have learned one thing over the past few days.

There is no point on getting mad at the people you love.

It is a waste of time.

Really!

When you get mad at someone. It doesnt affect them. It affects you. It makes YOU sad. It makes YOU grumpy.

Not them.
Actually, if you dont speak out. They wont even know you are mad.

Im just saying that it is always better to forgive and forget

Dont throw your relationships out the window. Not every single thing you dislike is a reason to argue.

If there is one thing i want my friends and family to say about me is:

She’s graceful. And forgiving.

Are you being graceful and forgiving?

Im not. But im trying.

Always keep in mind that God is graceful and forgiving.

Who are we not to do the same for others?

It is all about selflessness.

FLF

Posted in FLF by misspicture on February 4, 2010
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My baby brother had not been feeling well for the past two days. He had a fever yesterday morning but he was fine by noon.

He was happily napping. I was watching glee right beside him. my right hand was touching his little left leg.

Fever was apparently gone.

Out of the blue he started shaking and getting all red.

a convulsion.

My beloved almost son was having a convulsion.

I left the room, holding his little shaking body, screaming! Shortly enough we (me, my cousin, and the lady who helps us at the house)  -literally-  ran to the nearest med. center. It took us about 4 min. [Thank you Chavez] and there they put him on an oxigen masc, gave him some shots and then we (me and the baby) got into the shower so the fever would go down.

2 hours later. He was fine. He IS fine.

But me. I am still shaking.

The whole time i was at the med. center holding my -hardly breathing- brother i was singing “Holy is the Lord, God Almighty… The earth is filled with His glory…” while bawling my eyes out. And Let me tell you. It is not easy. It is not easy to sing and cry at the same time. It is not easy to see the person you love the most in this world having so much trouble to breathe. It is not easy to NOT be in control. It is not easy to be thankful…. It wasnt easy to remain thankful yesterday.

When i got home. I prayed this prayer. While still bawling my eyes out. “God. I dont get it. But it doesnt matter. I choose to worship You. You are good. You are good”

He is good. He will never cease to be good. Ever.

Yesterday was officially the worst day of my life.

Not only because my brother had a convulsion. But mostly because i realized how much i love him. I love him so much it hurts.

He is my Isaac.

And God is asking me to leave him.

and I will. In 30 weeks.

I am devastated. It hurts. It hurts so much it gets hard to breathe.

But one thing remains clear.

God is good.
and my circumstances  are unable to change that.

Be encouraged! Stay strong! Remain Thankful!

:)

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on February 4, 2010
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Last night i had my share of quality time. I went out with a group of friends and just talked and talked for two good hours. I left that place with a big smile on my face.

ah! i love having friends. Im the kind of person who has various groups of friends. I have the high-school friends. College friends. Church friends. work friends. and French-class friends. And i love them all!

After being stuck in the house since last sunday i really needed to go out and “see the world”.

It was worth it. It was different.

Last night i went to bed knowing that everything is right with the world. I am comfortable with who i am. My life is somehow perfect right now. There is nothing else i need. I think i have never felt like this before- ever.

I am ready to grow up.
Move forward
And enjoy what God has planned.

Because today.
Today is just the first day of the rest of my life.

🙂

10 THINGS i dont want.

Posted in 10 Things by misspicture on February 2, 2010
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In no particular order

I DONT want…

1- To ever allow anything or anyone to take God’s place in my life

2- To not be able to keep contact with my friends while in Africa

3- To miss my little brother’s 2nd birthday and his first day of school

4- To have someone else cook for my husband and kids. I will be the Queen of that kitchen (even if its tiny) im telling you. No one feeds my family but momma.

5- To have someone else raise my kids.

6- To be scared about support raising. Im about to pee my pants- scared

7- To ignore what i believe God has been telling me.

8- To be confused about what i believe God has been telling me.

9- To have a busy schedule this year

10- To be in this “detox” diet. But im just supporting my mom you know… IM STARVING! Daniel fast is going to kill me in 14 days.

My LOVE language [Parte DOS]

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on February 1, 2010
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Ok. I cant stop thinking about my love language.

And it just HIT me.

This is the way i relate to God. It is the way i show Him i love Him.

I spend time with Him.

That is why i struggle SO much with quiet time. When i dont sit down and spend quality time with Him i feel like im not loving Him.

tricky, huh?!

Oh! the things you learn about yourself….

I like this though.

I LOVE the fact that having a quiet time is not just a ritual in my day but an act of love and worship. While i sit down with a cup of tea (yes, tea is mandatory) and with an open Bible i feel (and He knows because He made me this way) on my highest level of love. yes. si!

I am amazed by this.

I LOVE IT.

what about you? how do you feel like you are loving God the most?

My LOVE language

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on February 1, 2010
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I  have been thinking a lot about this lately and i think i know what’s my love language.

according to a book by Gary Chapman there are 5 ways we can give and receive love.

– Words of affirmation

– Quality time

– Gifts

– Acts of service

– Physical touch

For me its quality time. HANDS DOWN

If you know me you know im a people person. I love people and getting to know them. In fact. That is one of the reasons…. or i could even say.. THE reason why im not a big movie fan. You cant talk while watching a movie. at least you shouldnt. I would rather go out for tea (we dont really have coffee shops in vzla) and just talk and talk and talk for hours. Thats me.

I love getting to know people and just engaging in deep conversations. I love listening and being able to give advices.

I do enjoy time alone. I need it. daily.

But i get my energy from people and conversations. It’s just the way i am

I dont necessarily have to be the one doing the talking. Its ok if im just the listener. Silence is often welcomed and enjoyed.

Im all about company.

Quality is what matters. not so much quantity.

That’s how i show love.
But that is also how i expect to be loved.

I expect to be listened to. I expect you to engage in our conversation. I expect you to leave your cellphone/laptop/ipod in your pocket.

maybe im expecting a little too much…? maybe.

That’s me. raw me.

But.. Whats your love language?

🙂

ps: the picture above was stolen from Heather Whittaker. It took me almost 4 hours to find the perfect picture. It was worth it. This describes my love language. perfectly.

FLF

Posted in FLF by misspicture on January 29, 2010
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yeah…

Im having a sushi discipleship date with Nore. AND im exciteed!!

we are studying Philipians and it has been amazing to learn about our weaknesses and how they can bring glory to God. well.. that’s actually today’s study.

Nore dont read this.

I also found this website HERE and im currently watching GREEK

I love that show.

I leave you with some worship

Yes… in french.

Roi des cieux- Dan Luiten

Oh McDonalds!

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on January 28, 2010
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waiter: Good afternoon, what can i get for you?
Me: Good afternoon, Can i  just have a Pepsi light please?
Waiter: Ok. What can i get you to drink?
Me: uhm.. a can of pepsi light please.
Waiter: Pepsi?
Me: yes, sir
Waiter: Did you just say light?

Oh Boy!

Have you ever had this happen to you?

Did you miss me?

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on January 27, 2010
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Im not really sure what to blog about. I think im a little rusty from the strike. Which im so glad i did by the way…

Ok so a few things happened while a i was gone…

1- I started Discipleship or DSHIP, as i liked to call it, with my friend Nore

2- I filled out my application to go to Africa for a year.

3- I asked my pastor, my best friend, my ex-boss, and my mentor (Sorry Jyll i would have asked you, but you are in the DR. I love you!) to fill out my references.

4- I discovered a hidden love for Jazz. So far i like, Norah Johns, Michael Buble, and Jamie Cullum. (Marcus. your recommendations are on my “to listen” list)

5- I really really like  “Vanilla Twilight” by owl city

6- Im not sure if Romans 8:25 was a “yes, but wait” answer. And this is pretty much killing me.

7- ZACH IS DONE WITH SUPPORT! woohooo

8- My friend Ryan bought his ticket to go to Uganda for two years as a missionary. If you want to know how you can support him. Ask me. Double wooohoooo

9- Im going on a Daniel Fast starting FEB 15th.

10- I will read the book of Ruth 21 times. (once a day while fasting) Cant wait!

11- There is a reason why i picked that book. dont ask.

12- My baby brother gets cuter and cuter

13- My job description has changed to pretty much “change diapers and play with a 14 month old”

14- I like my new job.

15- I still go to the office. When strictly necessary. My boss (AKA: mom) would rather have me here taking care of her boy, than at the office. SCORE!

16- Im flipping scared about support raising.

17- I may or may not know one of my roommates for next year. 🙂

18- I may have or may have not found a Venezuelan  to go to Africa with me in Sept. 🙂

19- Venezuela has 2 hours black-outs a day. One dollar costs more than a bottle of water AND the government is killing students all over the country. to name a few things….

20- God is still in Control.

21- God is re-directing my passion for Africa. My vision is blurry but i know it involves college students.

22- Man.. this makes me want to dance. God bless Latin America 🙂

Now. PLEASE. Tell me. Did you miss me?
Because i missed you.

To all the crazy people out there…

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on January 19, 2010
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Thanks for your comments and ideas-

I pray God will continue to straighten you as you continue to do CRAZY things. 🙂

I heard that one of my friends is going on a last minute mission trip. And i just thought: “This is it, Jesus.  This is it”

I want a heart that listen to the voice of God and ACTS on it. Instantly.

I think i came up with my crazy thing.

Giving up 65% the money destined for entertainment on my budget. For 3 months.

Starting feb 1.
until April 30.

May 1st. I am SO going out to eat.

It’s not much. But it hurts. And if it hurts its sacrificial. If its sacrificial… then that’s what im doing.

Random thought: Going to Africa sounds crazy enough to me…. HA!

This a very shapeless post. Im just throwing random thoughts in here.

oh well!

Keep it up! Keep living a crazy life for Jesus. And let me know how it goes….

Oh! oh! Before i forget.

I have the application-for my One year internship in Africa- sitting right next to me. Half done.

I cant believe this is happening.

I am scared.

CRAZY THING

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on January 18, 2010
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Did you read my BONUS post this saturday?

well…

I was determined to do something CRAZY for Jesus and step out of my comfort zone so others could be blessed.  Now, Im still determined to do it but im just not going to do that particular thing.

Ill spare you of the details… But my parents didn’t approve. In fact they felt offended.

Not a good thing.

Im frustrated though. I REALLY wanted to do that thing. (not because i wanted wanted to. But because i knew it would allow me to be more dependent on God)

Oh well.

Im trying to come up with something else that is crazy. And i’ve got a rough idea of what that might be… But im not sure yet.

I will let you know soon. Stay tuned.

Thanks for all the support.

What is something -CRAZY- You are currently doing? How are you dying to yourself so that others can be blessed?

BONUS- challenge

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on January 17, 2010
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This is another saturday post.

welcome! 🙂

Last week i read an awesome book by Francis Chan called CRAZY LOVE. It talks about so many things that it’s hard to paraphrase but if i had to describe it with a word it would be challenging

You have to read it. It will change the way you live your “christian” life.

And i have been thinking about what is it that God wants me to do specifically. What does He want me to change? In what areas of my life am i living a lukewarm christianity?

Today  i listened to this message by Francis Chan. Look for \”Lukewarm and loving it\” This will slap you in the face.

And i know what God wants me to do.

and… can i say OUCH!?

1- It is something i dont want to do

2- It is something i am scared to do

3- It is something my parents wont approve

4- It is something my friends wont approve

5- It is something C-R-A-Z-Y and radical

I dont want to do this. No way! details later…

But you know what? I dont ever ever EVER want to knowingly ignore the voice of my God.
I want people to look at me and kNOW that there is something strange inside of me… something they dont have (Jesus). I dont ever want to have treasures in this world. I want to invest in His kingdom… not because He promises to bless me but mostly because of my crazy love for the King.

Today the words of a dear friend become true and not-so-crazy- anymore.

“I would be happy living in a studio. I dont need much. Poor wife…”
Im with you George.!

He is right. Now i get it.

What kind of life are we living? Does our life reflect the love, compassion, selflessness and surrender of Jesus?

We are way too comfortable….

So im doing something CRAZY. Im not telling you quite yet. But you’ll know

God wants everything from us. Not just leftovers. He wants everything.

And if for you that means being uncomfortable… then so be it!

Now i dont want you to think that i want everyone to be poor. Nor i believe that everyone needs to be rich. I think there should be a balance.

“Give God your first and your BEST, and trust Him to bless the rest” – Craig Groaeshel

BONUS

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on January 15, 2010
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SEE how much i love you -my readers-? Im writing a BONUS post on a friday!

I have a raw idea of what i want to say… Ill do my best to develop it as a write. It’s how i roll/ If i wait. I loose it.

where do i start?

uhm..

Disclaimer: I dont usually write about this. Not because i dont want to but because it is just not the purpose of this blog. But what im feeling right now is well worth blogging about.

If you’ve spent some time with me. You probably know that i dont hide what i feel. Sometimes i wish i could hide my feelings and just keep my mouth shut. But i just cant. Sometimes im proud of it. Sometimes im ashamed of it. It depends.

the thing is… Oh man, i cant believe im really going to write this on a public blog.

He is funny. He is not very good at telling jokes but for some reason they make me laugh. he gets all excited if i laugh when anyone else is. He is cute. He is mature with a little sparkle of immatureness. He is taller than me. He is a gentleman. He thinks about marriage a lot. More than anyone around him knows. He has a neat bed and a very organized tiny room. He knows how to match his dress pants with the right shirt. He can clean the floor like any one i know. He is protective. He opens the door for girls. He is a faithful and caring friend. He is shy.

He is head-over-hills in love with Jesus. He keeps a journal. He is one of the best christians i’ve met. He is humble and genuine. He has guy friends. He has a servant’s heart. He actually reads his bible and lives it. He looks right into my eyes.

But he walks out the room whenever our conversations get interesting.

crap.

too good to be true.

Q’ Time: Prayer

Posted in Q' Time,Randomness by misspicture on January 13, 2010
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Q’ Time: stands for QUESTION time. so… would you please answer the question on red bellow?

thanks 🙂

//

Everyone who’s asked me about my trip to Africa has heard me say it.

It was a school of prayer.

IT was.

Those people prayed about everything and all the time. I had never seen that before. It amazed me.

But then i came back.
and i stopped.

But im on it again.

I picked a few things ill be praying for during this month. daily

I will eventually add new requests to this list. This is all im taking for now.

– A friend i met on the Newspring web-service. She has been addicted to drugs for 3 year. She has been going to the webservice for a few months now and has kept herself clean for about a week now.

– Another friend who is dealing with sin in her life and asked me to keep her accountable.

Zach and Marcus and their mission trip to Nicaragua. more info HERE

Nore as we prepare for Discipleship! yay!

– Mariana as im begging God to let me disciple her too before i leave.

– My dad’s gambling addiction

– Africa and the ministry there.

Would you join me?

This is pretty much all im praying right now.

I know there are Lots of things i should add to that list. But im starting small. Prayer is not something that comes easy for me. So… hang with me.

What are some of your constant prayers?

Ps: i actually wrote this yesterday (wednesday jan 13th) Because i wont have electricity today from 7am to 11am.

Meet my brother…

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on January 13, 2010
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He is the cutest thing in the world. He is precious to me. Specially because he came out of no-where and to me he is the best picture of the hand of God doing the impossible.

My baby brother is my joy and what i love the most in this world-

BUT!

He wont let me take pictures of himself….

It is nearly impossible.

here are some of the best…

Marriage-

Posted in Insights by misspicture on January 12, 2010
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Now, i am not an expert on this subject. I am as clueless as someone who is not married and has -almost- never dated anyone.

But i was talking to my favorite girl in the whole wide world the other day (*M) and she asked me if there was an example of a godly marriage in the Bible. we both agreed that there had to be one but we didnt know where to find it.

As many of you know i started NEWthru30 yestarday. (reading the New testament in 30 days)

and i think i found the couple *M and i were looking for.

Mary and Joseph

Here’s what Matthew has to say

The Birth of Jesus Christ

18This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit. 19Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.

20But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit.21She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus,[c] because he will save his people from their sins.”

22All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: 23“The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel”[d]—which means, “God with us.”

24When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife.25But he had no union with her until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus. Matthew 1:18-24

Here are some of my thoughts…

1- Protection <v. 19>

Joseph longed to protect his bride. no-matter-what. He was willing to divorce her quietly -even if she had cheated on him- because he didnt want to dishonor her.

2- God’s voice <v.20/ v.24>

Joseph heard the voice of God. Now, that is the man we want to spend the rest of our lives with… He heard the voice of God and more importantly. He obeyed.

3- Holiness <v.25>

Joseph and Mary kept themselves pure until the time was right.

I love Mary’s attitude though
She does nothing. She only waits and prays (im sure…)

Now, as a woman i know what was going through her mind. I know exactly the thoughts she was having to deal with. Oh! i know! But she decides to be still and trust God to bring her man back to her. She doesnt call him, go talk to his parents, facebook him, or manipulates him. She lets God do His job.

ah! She’s my hero! lol

This passage tells us how to deal with conflict while in a relationship

SEEK GOD. LISTEN. OBEY James 4:17

Im sure it’s not easy, and im sure some of us were expecting more out of the Holy Book when it comes to relationships. But the truth is… This is enough. This is it. And it applies to every little single aspect in out lives…

Seek God. Listen. And then, Obey!


Im the worst christian ever. BONUS

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on January 9, 2010
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dad: Can i borrow your cellphone?

me: sure!

after a few minutes i went to where he was and told him (not-so-politely): “You are going to consume all my minutes!!!!”

went back to my room and felt horrible

I am the worst christian ever.

I just finished reading CRAZY LOVE by Francis Chan. Awesome book. But what happened to all the words i had just read? why did i have to be so selfish and be a jerk to my dad? why did i not love him? why didnt i show Jesus to him?

I am the worst christian ever. I am ashamed

I need to go apologize-

now.

FLF

Posted in FLF by misspicture on January 8, 2010
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I just downloaded Facebook to my Blackberry. After 6 month of living a facebook notifications-free life. So im not sure what to do with my FLF….  my cellphone keeps ringing showing me that i have fb messages but i have not checked them all day today… i dont know what to do.

maybe i shouldnt have downloaded the facebook application again…. BUT i have  an excuse for that and that is i came up with a daily schedule and when i was done with it i realized facebook was not included in my day. So i decided to download it on my Blackberry again… It feels so weird.

But i dont know whats going to happen with my FLF. 
I mean, i should stick with this. I need a break from Facebook once a week. I dont want it… But i like challenges!

so here’s what im going to do…
Im going to ignore the notifications on my Blackberry. Every friday-

I need your encouragement-
Every friday-

 

10 Things im thankful for

Posted in 10 Things by misspicture on January 7, 2010
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in no particular order

1- Friends. Faithful friends. Fun friends. Friends who never write back. Cool friends. New friends. Twitter/blog friends. Missionary friends. I am so blessed for all of them

2- Grace. Mercy. Jesus

3- DUDE! im going to freaking North Africa in september

4- My supporters who are also my friends

5- French classes.

6- Christmas breaks

7- Family

8- My church

9- Steven Furtick and Perry Noble

10- The word of God.

What are you thankful for?

?!@#$%~!!!

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on January 6, 2010
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Guess who’s going to North Africa in september?

yeah…

My pastor said yes.

and i know i should write a better post considering how big of a deal this is for me. but… words are just not coming out.

Thoughts- BONUS

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on December 29, 2009
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Here are some thoughts after a bad day…

1- I miss my Ms in a way i never thought i would.
2- Im on my own in this.
3- No-one here understands
4- They will not understand
5- And that’s ok
6- I dont like # 2, 3 and 4. But its all part of the process
7- I asked for forgiveness. Being this miserable doesnt bring glorty to God
8- I miss my M* girls
9- I would take that plane tomorrow if i could
10- Its just me and God.
11- This next year is going to be challenging
12- I am growing. I am growing. I become a new creature with every passing day. He is my perfecter. I am becoming more like Him.
13- Boy, i am selfish!
14- Jesus is fixing that. Dont worry.
15- Sadness is over.
16-Im on my own.
17- No one understands
18- repeat # 8
19- My spirit is listening
20- My relationship with Him has never been stronger
21- #20 is true just because of # 2,10 and 16
22- waiting sucks
23- I LOVE my life
24- I HATE waiting
25- I am doing this right. I am doing life right. This is right.
26- I may or may not go to N.A next year
27- But. I am doing this right.
28- I love blogging
29- I just finished the book of Acts and i start Romans tomorrow. (8 days until i finish up the Bible)
30- I think Acts is my -new- favorite book of the Bible.
31- Be still and Know that I am God- Psalms 46:10
32- I am doing this right. I have bad days. But im doing this right.
33- Thank you Jesus.

Saturday -BONUS- Post

Posted in BONUS by misspicture on December 19, 2009
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First of all. THANK YOU for your prayers! I really appreciate all your text messages, emails, calls and tweets.

My meeting went super well. My pastor was super kind in giving me all the time i needed to share my story and my thoughts about the trip. He also told me that he believed in my call and that, as a church, they were planning on sending me. He just didnt know when and how.

Yeah…

We are meeting again in january.
He promised to have an answer to the when and how then.

I will let God show him what He showed me. Gen 28;15

I am still processing this.

What do you think i should do?

Changing the subject….

Have i told you about my friends lately?

I have many, many good friends that i love and cherish.

But there are 3…. M*, A* and S* and they have the best friend tag in my soul.

M* is a girl and i always blog about her. She will have her chance to shine in this blog. But i wont talk about her today. Though i keep her close to my heart.

Today. It will be about the two boys that have won my heart. A* and S*. They are my brothers, my friends, my travel buddies. They let me tell them what to wear, and im always invited to their family parties. When they have stupid boy-fights they call me and ask for advice. They tickle me. They drive me home. sometimes they pay for my meals. sometimes they open the door for me. They buy me christmas presents. They care about me. They love me.

And i love them. deeply

I will have TWO “best men” @ my weeding- I dont care what my groom says-  And it will be them.

I have been so blessed to be able to share my life with these two.

Watch out, girls! If you ever date one of them. You will have to go through their little sister first! AKA: me!

Today is a good day. A good day to be thankful.
Thankful for godly men in my life.

Enjoy the rest of the weekend.!

FLF- 8 seconds or less

Posted in FLF by misspicture on December 18, 2009
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Welcome to my Facebook-Less Friday post.

Today is my BIG meeting with my pastor.

I am going to tell him all about my trip to Africa and that God told me loud and clear to go back in sept for a year. [i dont know what he might think about that] so.. would you PLEASE! pray?

You dont have to pray for hours…. you can just take 8 seconds of your precious and valuable time to say something like “God, show up in that meeting” or “Jesus, help her not to worry” or “Lord, soften her pastor’s heart” out-loud !

I NEED your prayers.

Here’s why…

1- I am going to show him my heart in that meeting. I am going to share about my fears and my dreams
2- He might want me to stay here for a few more years. But i feel like i would be disobeying  God if i were to stay.
3- I know i should obey God’s voice rather than my pastors opinions…. But its just not easy. I know that my pastor is a man of God and he wants the best for me. So his opinion is very very important for me.
4- I just want you to be a part of what God is doing in my life.

So please… 8 seconds or less. Please pray!

And i might bless you with a saturday post. Just to let you know that your prayers were answered.

So lets make of this Facebook-Less Friday. A Prayer-Full Friday!

To be continued….

Selfless Love

Posted in Insights by misspicture on December 14, 2009
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What kind of love is that?

Is that the kind 1 corinthians 13 talks about? I would say so.

That is the kind of love Jesus gave. It is the kind of love i want to give. It is the kind of love God is teaching me to, fisrt, experience so i can, then, share  with others.

A love that is not based on feelings or in being confortable but a love that is based on a decision. Sometimes things happen and you feel like the person you once said you loved is not so loveable anymore because of something they did or said.

when that happens i realize that real love does not cease. Real love never stops. Real love will always love. Real love does not depend on circumnstances. Real love never dies.

The Bible says (cant remember where) that your yes should always be yes and your no should always be no. When the words “I- Love- You” come out of my mouth. I want them to represent my commitment to stand by that person forever, no-matter-what.

Do me a favor. And do God a favor (not that you can really do Him favors… but you get the idea) Dont take those words for granted. And when you do say “I love you”  let it be forever.  Otherwise, i would consider you a liar.

God is impressing this in my heart. So BAD!
Be encoraged! God loves you with this kind of love. A-M-A-Z-I-N-G

Anything you’d like to say…?

Selfish: To Be or Not To Be……??

Posted in Insights by misspicture on December 12, 2009
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This is the big question i am struggling with right now.

You know the answer
I know the answer

But… It is HARD mostly because my flesh is lauder than my spirit.

There are many situations in my life right now. Where i am constantly being tempted to be selfish and to focus on my wants and my needs. It is so easy to get lost in what makes me feel uncomfortable an what makes me mad. But what about others? what about those i say i love?

If i focus on myself. Is it real love? or is it selfish love?
WAIT. Can the words love and selfish be in the same sentence?

I dont think so.

Love is all about giving.

Loving someone means you put them first. It means biting your thong  when you dont have anything good to say. It means listening even when you want them to shut up so you can speak. It means waiting. It means patience. And it means forever

Yes! Forever.

What am i learning?

Easy! Ok, ok…. its not that easy.
But God is teaching me how to die to myself and put others first. I am painfully learning to protect the ones i love from my selfishness. Once again… It is not about me.

Living a life like Jesus’ is not an easy job. But it is worth it. And i love the fact that everything happens for a reason. And i am constantly learning how to be the woman He created me to be.

I love you Jesus. Thank you for your selfless love.

What about you?

Have you been a selfish little brat this week?

What do you see?

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on December 7, 2009
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I just read this qoute by Cs. Lewis. “What you see and what you hear has a lot to do with where you are standing”

so i find myself going through my thoughs searching for some of the things i have been seeing/hearing lately… And its funny because i have been seeing bad things comming but the second i think about them i hear a voice gentenly saying : “It will be ok. Everything is going to be ok”

And im not sure why im writting this down. Or what all these mean. But i know one thing… No matter what my eyes see. My spirit still listens to His voice. THE voice.

and for that. I am glad.

What about you?
What are you seeing/hearing?

1st Post!

Posted in Randomness by misspicture on October 7, 2009
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Hello Everyone!

Thanks for stopping by. This is still under construction!

How do i look?

Love-
MP