The Heart of a Missionary-

I am afraid of…

Posted in Insights by misspicture on April 7, 2010
Tags: ,



There was a point in my life (not so long ago) where i was surrounded by people. Lots of people. My schedule was packed with lunch dates, dinner dates, study groups, bible studies, movie nights, sleep overs, and quick trips to the ice cream place.

I was confortable.

If you know me. You know i am a people person. And quality time is my love language.

I was confortable.

Then i decided to go to Africa for a month last october. And while i was there decided to go back for a year this next september.

And ever since i came back. I have been living and experiencing my greatest and deepest fear.


and it doesnt matter how many times you tell me im wrong.

I feel lonely.
Because I am alone in this process.

And i have learned one thing.
It is ok

I have learned to go to God first when i freak out
I have learned to hang out with Jesus on the weekends
I have learned to stay in silence in the presence of God

I still have people around me.
I dont feel  lonely because of a lack of friends

I feel lonely because this is just part of a process God is taking me through. He is teaching me that He is more faithful than any friend, and that He is the only thing i need to hold on to.

I feel lonely.
And it is ok.

So, dear reader. Let me tell you one thing. Your biggest fear could be the path God chooses to walk  you through to show you His love and care for you.





For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7


2 Responses to 'I am afraid of…'

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  1. M said,

    I can relate..very much. I didn’t move to another country to find out that loneliness isn’t worth all the hype around it though.

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